Reflection: Anticipation Anxiety
Anticipation anxiety is the tension that shows up when we know something is coming, an event, a conversation, or any moment where we need to show up. The anxiety doesn’t come from the event itself, but from the waiting, the imagining, and the feeling of being on standby. Even before the moment begins, the body can react as if it’s already happening.
Source of the anxiety
For some people, anticipation anxiety comes from genuinely caring about the outcome. The desire to do well can activate the body early, sometimes too early. For others, it has nothing to do with pressure or overthinking. It begins in the body itself: a shift into alert mode when the environment feels less familiar or less safe. The nervous system reacts before the mind does. The belly tightens, the breath becomes shallow, and a cycle forms, each physical reaction reinforcing the next. This is why someone might play or perform differently at home or around people they trust, the body feels safer there, and everything works more naturally.
Both types of anticipation anxiety are rooted in the body’s need to feel safe, but they start from slightly different entry points: In “caring about the outcome”, the nervous system is activated because of pressure, expectations, or the desire to do well. Even though the activation is triggered by the mind, the way to calm it is still through creating safety in the body. In “safety-based” anxiety, the nervous system is triggered first, independent of expectations. You feel tense or reactive simply because the environment or situation feels uncertain or unfamiliar.
Overcome anticipation anxiety
It starts with understanding the source of your anxiety. Anticipation anxiety doesn’t mean you’re unprepared or unsafe. It means you are human, and your body is trying to help you.
If your anxiety comes from caring about the outcome: understand relaxation and readiness can coexist. You don’t need to be tense to perform well; your best presence comes when your body feels safe. Small grounding actions, slow breathing, gentle humming to relax the diaphragm and vagus nerve, softening the belly, loosening the jaw, signal to your body that you are not in danger. Anxiety often grows in the empty space of waiting. When the mind has nothing to do but anticipate, it fills that space with worry. The antidote is gentle engagement: staying present, noticing your surroundings, moving your body slightly, or giving the mind a simple task to prevent spiraling thoughts.
If your anxiety comes from the body sensing a lack of safety: Focus on creating safety first. Allow the belly to soften and the breath to drop naturally, feel your feet grounded, and release unnecessary tension. Recognize that the nervous system is alerting you, providing your body with physical cues of safety allows it to settle naturally.
